Here's a *true* story I heard. A Preacher wanted to raise money for his church and being told there was a fortune in horse racing he decided to purchase a horse and enter it in the races. However, at the local auction the going price for horses was so steep that he ended up buying a donkey instead. He figured that since he had him he might as well enter him in the races. And to his surprise the donkey came in third! The next day the paper carried the headlines "Preacher's Ass Shows". The preacher was so pleased with the donkey that he entered him in another race and this time he won. The paper read the next day "Preacher's Ass Out Front". The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the preacher not to enter the donkey in anymore races. The paper printed the headlines, "Bishop Scratched Preacher's Ass". This was too much for the Bishop and he ordered the Preacher to get rid of the Donkey. The Preacher gave it to a Nun in a nearby Convent. Headlines the next day read, "Nun has best Ass in Town". The Bishop had a fit and ordered the Nun to get rid of the donkey. She found a farmer willing to buy it for $10.00. The next day headlines read, "Nun Peddles Ass for $10.00". They buried the Bishop the next day.